we have pet lesbian snakes
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
