Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
