Screwed.edu
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
as a side note pls kill me
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