in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
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