dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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