The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Life without a bra equals bliss.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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