at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
