you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
