there was a trapeze. enough said
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
