In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
