But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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