I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
