I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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