Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
