Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
