oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
