Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
