Don't you send me to vm
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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