she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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