Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
