I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
