i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
