Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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