I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
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