It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He did a backflip because drugs
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
