i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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