Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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