My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I just blew my weed a kiss
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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