Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
My bed smells like the plague
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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