I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
do herpes really smell.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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