Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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