We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
