Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
