I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
