you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
The power of my boobs compel you
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
