Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
