Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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