Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
