I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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