Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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