I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
