Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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