At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
