i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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