Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
