Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
