one word: firstdatebathroomanal
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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