like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
