How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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