Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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